Since the day I found out I was pregnant with Jackson (actually, let’s be honest, since before I was even pregnant) I have been terrified of the day he would get sick for the first time. I heard the nightmare stories about my niece and nephew and was so scared of those things happening to us.

Just before Christmas Jackson got his first cold. Yes….just a cold, but it was still a dreadful experience. Imagine not being able to blow your own nose!! Luckily the runny nose and horrible sleeping only lasted a few days. That’s nothing compared to what we experienced the other night.

A few times during the day and evening, Jackson had some coughs that we had never heard before.  He was still acting himself, but he was coughing and sounding a little wheezy.  We put him to bed as usual and went to bed ourselves a couple hours later. 12:30 rolls around and we wake up to Jackson coughing and sounding horrible. This time it sounded like a bark and he seemed to be gasping for air. I immediately thought CROUP, since I had it when I was a little girl.  As any mom would do, I called my own mom in panic and wondering if we should go to the emergency room.  She suggested we try a steam shower for 10 minutes and call her when we finished. 5 minutes in, Jackson seems to be getting worse so we bolt for the emergency room. A breathing treatment, dose of steroids, and chest x-rays leads us to the diagnosis of viral croup.

I’m convinced that I have one of the most laid back, easy-going babies on the block. He was even smiling at the nurses in the emergency room while he is having trouble breathing! The only time he cried was when we did x-rays because I had to hold him down (he loves kicking and squirming).  There is no doubt that I was more upset than he was. Witnessing my child go through this horrible ordeal was beyond anything I could have imagined. I felt helpless, terrified, worried, and anxiously wanting it to end!

Nothing could have prepared me for this experience. In fact, when/if something like this happens again, it will be just as difficult.  This proved just how much I love this little guy and will do everything in my power to protect him.

One positive from this experience…I learned that Jackson is one strong and brave little boy! I am so lucky to be his momma!

“Being a mother is learning about strengths you didn’t know you had, and dealing with fears you didn’t know existed.” ~Linda Wooten